Comedy: What is a Lad?

I have always had a huge interest in comedy, particularly stand-up. I like the idea of making other people laugh, so after studying a Comedy module in my second year at Uni, I set myself the challenge of writing a small stand-up piece.

I also have quite a huge interest in gender studies, mainly feminism and gender inequality. I want to state right now that my piece is not an open attack of misandry or “man-hating” on the male population in anyway. It is purely one girl’s interpretation of Lad culture on a big night out up town.

“What is a ‘lad’?

A ‘lad’ is someone who spends hours readying himself for the following night’s frivolities.

These usually include but are not restricted to:

Watching football or rugby in a jam-packed bar, exchanging banter with his like-minded mates. You usually find his friends all look the same because their gear usually consists of the same variation of Jeans and a shirt. Which seems to be the ‘Standard!’

Drinking copious amounts of cheap, unpronounceable alcoholic beverages.

Flirting with and chatting up anything that looks remotely female and actually appears to be alive, of course, only after the match has finished, a ‘lad’ does have his priorities after all.

Adjusting his loose change in his pockets, more so as the night wears on and as he becomes more turned on.

Dancing in a po-going fashion and chanting to Chelsea Dagger like a noise activated flower with his ‘pint’ sloshing over the dancefloor.

You know, watching a lad on a night out is like watching Darwin’s dawn of Man, but, in reverse.

He commences the night as a well-adjusted, young male, who could charm the knickers off a nun, and ends the night struggling to pull Bubbles the Chimp, but not to worry lads, “you are not alone”,there’s plenty of others out there, just like you.

Upon failing to pull, despite his perceived, heavenly good-looks, which make him believe that he appears to have fallen from Zeus’s a**e, now let’s be honest, us girls need more than your iced gem haircut and finely styled stubble to be convinced that you are in fact a god. He returns to the safety of his pack, where he convinces himself “I was only doin’ ‘er a favour anyway cuz she was a right munter.” The lads all stagger to the nearest kebab shop, thus ensuring that tonight’s hunt results in meat for all of them, it’s just a pity it’s not a handful of pulled pork. Whey!“

Send me a comment and let me know what you think!